People in business and working women ask me how I consistently take action and get things done even when I work full time. Am I wired differently? No, not all. I'm just an ordinary woman with a family, great job and two  businesses that I run efficiently. There are lots of parallelpreneurs like me (people who work and grow a business alongside) and my mission is to help you build your resilience in life and business by sharing my tips. I grew my speaking business by 240% in one year and my wellness centre (a brick and mortar business) by 53% in its 4th year (town population of 10,000). If I can do it, so can you.

My blog will give you tips on how to change your mind set, how to change your patterns, how to overcome challenges and bounce back from setbacks. I'd love for you to comment on my blogs and give me some feedback.


Oh No, I am Messy!

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My husband's 14 year-old niece was visiting us over Christmas Holidays and she saw the book that I had co-authored: Unlock the Power of You – 12 Keys to Health, Happiness and Success. My expertise in the book is on behavioral weight loss and she asked me what I mean by that. I simply said, "I help people change their relationship with food by changing their behaviors." She replied, "But how?"

I apologized to her and told her I could have explained it better. I explained, "Do you know how some people say that they are a carboholic or a chocoholic or they are addicted to a certain food? Well, they are identifying themselves as that rather than identifying it as a behavior. Once we identify it as a habit or behavior we can change that easily."

She nodded her head and said, "So, if I say I am messy then I am identifying myself as a messy person?" "What do you mean by messy, you look fine to me?" I asked. She laughed and replied, "No, I leave my room in a mess, yet I tell people that I am messy." "Ah, so if you keep saying I am messy, you will continue to leave your room in a mess now, wouldn't you?" I said. "How do I change that?" She asked.

"How would you change your wording so it sounds like you are not your mess, but you have a habit or behavior?" I asked. "I have a habit of leaving my room a mess?" She stated curiously. "Is it possible to change that habit?" I asked. "Yes," she replied. "What stops you from making your room more organized?" I asked. "I can organize it but I like to it do at my own time in my own way."

"So you do have the ability to be organized. Then what makes you say you are messy?" I asked, bringing her full circle and reframing it for her. She sat silent and I believe she was analyzing our conversation and thinking to herself that she is not her behavior! She looked at me and thanked me.

A wonderful lesson

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My 7-year old daughter is a member of Girl Guides and every year she has to sell a certain amount of cookies as a fundraiser. Last season, I brought her to my workplace, where I work 3 days a week, and told her she was responsible for fundraising. So she walks up to the front desk and politely asks the assistant to please announce, over the intercom, that she is selling cookies in the staff room.

Two or three people trickle in to buy a box of cookies and she knows there are more people that work in my building. So she decides to go into every office and ask, "Did you hear the announcement? Would you like to buy Girl Guide Cookies today?" Now, seriously, I did not ask her to do that, but I was surprised that she had the confidence, motivation and energy to do that! She would bring the money into my office and take a box and she kept on doing that until all the cookies were sold!

I asked her if people declined to buy the cookies and what she thought about that. She said, "They told me that they did not have money today or that they did not like the flavor I had." I probed her on how she felt about that. She answered, "That is ok. They can get it next time." She taught me a wonderful lesson on how not to get emotionally attached to the outcome of a sale and to continue selling if the answer is no...the next person may say YES!

Motivation Styles and Weight Loss - Pt 2

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Remember there are 2 motivations styles: Moving away from pain and moving toward goals or pleasure. Most people who struggle with weight have the motivation style of moving away from pain or discomfort when it comes to weight loss and weight control.

I can tell when my clients have a motivation style of moving away from pain or discomfort because of the words they use. If they use statements like:
I don't want to be unhealthy
I don't want to be overweight

they are making a mental picture of being unhealthy and overweight. Moreover, the feelings associated with these statements are negative and the subconscious mind does not process negative statements.

When you hear yourself make such statements, ask your self:
What do I want instead? (ensure the response is stated in positive). For example, my clients would reply:
I want to be healthy
I want to be thin
I want to be at ideal weight

What mental pictures are they creating now? Try this out and let me know how it helped. This is the first step in changing your motivation style. I have explained more about this in an upcoming book - Unlock the Power of You - 12 Keys to Health, Happiness and Success.

Strategies of Thin People and Those That Have Maintained their Weight

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One of strategies of thin people and those that have maintained their weight is the behavior of eating consciously. Let’s take the word SPEECH and break it down so you ca understand what eating consciously means:

S stands for Smaller bites

P stands for pauses between each bite

What is the secret behind the smaller bites and pauses? Easier digestion! When we wolf down our foods, most of us complain that we don't feel good or we get bloated or we are not satisfied. We have not given our body the time to take care of the food that is coming down. Digestion starts in the mouth with your tongue and teeth.

E stands for Enjoy every mouthful by learning to appreciate the smell, flavor and texture of food. We eat so fast these days that we forget to do that.

Next E stands for Eliminate distractions. Start becoming aware of what you are eating, how much you are eating and focus on the signals from your body. Thin people and those that have maintained their weight, eliminate distractions like watching TV, surfing the Internet or answering their calls when eating.

C stands for Content – what they eat and how it makes them feel after is very important to them. How do you order from a menu? Do you order a food item that will give you instant gratification - no matter how you feel after or do you order an item based on how you want to feel 2-3 hours later?

H stands for Hunger rating – they rate their hunger and stop before the stomach gets too full or before they start feeling the tightness of the stomach on the rib cage.

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